Communication - With Children Tips

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How do I deal with my child comparing me to his caregiver?

Parent-Caregiver Comparisons

You need to be quite clear and firm with your child about house rules. When confronted by comparisons of how you vs. someone else completes a task, or allows a certain behavior, make it quite clear that house rules are house rules, and rules for other places apply at those other places. For example, let your child know that Mrs. Smith at school may do things that way, and that is how to do it at school in her class, but at home nothing has changed. If you begin getting frequent comaprisons, you may wish to drop by and have a chat with the caregiver to compare notes. It is very likely she is receiving the same type of comparisons in reverse. It is very important to handle this in a manner which does not undermine the teacher's authority, or to show upset aty the comparisons, as this can lead to the child seeing an opening for taking advantage. Remember, be firm, but not angry. Children need to learn rules that are appropriate for the various situations they find themselves in, and being firm leads to the security of knowing that somethings will just not change and the confidence to deal with new ways of doing things in an appropriate context. Realise that this is not a sign of personal failure, but merely part of your child's personal growth.

How do I help improve my child´s listening skills?

Listening Begins at Home

There are a number of ways to teach kids to listen. Make stories interesting to listen to, and discuss them during and after they are read. Play Simon Says and other games that require attentive listening. Play telephone. Make up games finding rhyming words. Teach young children to use the real telephone on calls that are meaningful to them, such as chats with friends and grandparents. Teach older children (age 7 and above) how to take phone messages.

(This tip submitted by Shirley Sullivan, Kid Guru)

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